Creative Gem Awakenings

Frame Of Mind

By Monica Davis


I can barely see through the darkness and fog. This may have not been the best time to escape, but I've waited a long time for the right moment to come.  I can barely breathe, but I can't stop running. I mustn't be captured again.  I hear the howl of the wind with a faint roar of the dogs in the distance. They are looking for me.  I can't go back there to that horrible place.
            The air is cold, and I am not properly dressed, I have only but rags barely covering my body, my feet are bare, but I don't have time to let that concern me. Not really anything to be done about it anyway.  I'm on the run, running for my life.  I have managed to escape the cruel man who has held me captive, locked in a castle dungeon only let out for him to have his way with me and entertain himself.  I will not go back, I would rather die than be his sex slave any longer. If the king knew of him sparring my life he would most likely have his head, that's what I have gathered from over hearing the guards talking.  From what I've heard anyone who is accused of witchcraft is to be executed immediately, no trial.  It's so horrible what has been done to so many and so wrongfully. 
              When my village was raided many months ago I thought I was to be put to death.  Many girls and women were taken and accused of witchcraft. Most of which have already been executed. I was sparred only to be tortured and raped.
            I hope it doesn't get any colder, or I will not survive very long.  I must stop to catch my breath.  My heart is racing along with my whole body being weak and numb.  I must stop, only for a moment to catch my breath.  I stop and sit up against a tree.  I close my eyes just for a moment.  I then hear the howling of the dogs, it sounds as if they are closer, so I jump up to continue running.
            In the back of my mind I keep thinking this is not really happening to me, this can't be real.  But everything about this feels, sounds, and looks real.  Pinching myself is not going to make it go away.
            I’ve come too far to give up now.  If only I can find somewhere to hide.  It's very difficult to see in the darkness, especially with the fog, but it probably helps them not to see me as well.  I know of a village not too far from here, if I can make it there it would help my chances for survival.
            I stumble around until I find what appears to be a traveled path.  I decide to follow the path to see where it takes me.  The fog has lifted and the glow of the full moon is the only thing lighting my way.  I no longer hear the dogs, I must have gotten far enough away, and they have lost my scent.
            I keep walking until my legs give out from under me. I slowly fall to the ground. I feel nothing except the cool ground on my face; I just can't move another muscle.  I close my eyes and feel I'm about to lose consciousness, everything goes dark.
            I wake up to someone shaking me.  My heart starts pounding as I think I've been caught.  I rapidly open my eyes and see a red haired freckly faced, small boy, maybe around ten years old; staring at me.  I look around to find there are no other people in sight.  He looks at me as if he wasn't sure I was alive and asks "are you alright, can you walk?"
            I ask, “what’s your name boy?"  He replies, "William, ma'am."
            I try to stand, but I am weak and struggle.  William helps by grabbing my arm and assisting me up.  I smile, "Thank you, I am Maire."
            William offers to help me to his village where I can get something to eat and get warm.  The sun is now out; it warms me and makes me feel there is hope.
            As we walk down the path nearing William's village I ask, "Have you seen any guards from the castle here in the woods?"
            "No ma'am."  He replies.
            Surely they would look in the village to find me, but the question is whether they have already been there or not.  If they would have followed the path they would have come across me when I fell asleep.  I feel a little better knowing there is someone with me right now but also I feel scared that there is a possibility that this is not over yet.  I wouldn't want to put William or anyone else in harm’s way.
            We make our way into the village, all the people there stop and stare.  A woman with fiery red hair stops what she is doing dropping the basket she is holding as she rushes over to us.  The woman is William’s mother; I can see it in her eyes.  She motions me to follow her as she removes her cloak and covers me with it. We then walk into her home.  She takes me to her bed where I can sit.  She then gets some water and insists that I drink. She looks back at me as she is leaving the dwelling and smiles.
            Just outside of the dwelling, I hear William and his mother talking about how I must have escaped from the castle.  William's insisting that they must help hide me from the guards that are after me.  I hear his mother give him comfort by telling him that she will do her best to help.  I close my eyes.
            As I open my eyes I notice that the sun has gone down.  I awake to find that I am covered in extra blankets.  Through the darkness I can see a single candle burning, giving enough light that I can see some clothing nearby that appears to have been laid there for me to put on.  Where are William and his mother I wonder as I change my clothes?  I notice there is also a piece of bread sitting here, so I eat it.  It has been a while since I've had a meal.  I also notice it is very quiet inside as well as outside.  I decide to step out to see if I can find anyone.
            Outside I find William's mother resting.  "Thank you for everything you have done for me.  I will never forget your kindness" I tell her.  She smiles, "I am Naomh.  If it were safe I would let you stay but I fear it is not safe for you or my family." I agree I must leave.  I assure her that I will be gone by dawn.  Naomh nods in acceptance.
            I find myself many years later my light brown hair now turned white.  I am lying on my bed in my home completely alone.  I feel I am dying, I know I am. I am not sad.  I look back at my life and all of its adventures.  I have lived, learned and loved. I have no regrets.  I've been captured, tortured and accused of witchcraft and survived.  I have experienced great kindness from strangers. I married a wonderful man who gave me two children.  My husband had been prematurely taken from me to fight in a king’s army never to be seen again. Both my daughters are grown and away with their own families.  It has been a tough life but I have lived.  In the end even though I'm alone I have my memories and realize love is what matters, I still have love in my heart.  I am completely at peace.
            As it starts to go dark I begin to leave my body. My time is done.  I hear a faint voice one who has been with me this whole time, count down and tell me that on the count of one I will come back completely into my body, coming back toward normal.  I hear and see in my mind's eye the count of one.  I become wide awake, refreshed, relaxed and feeling great.
            I now have experienced what is feels like to be regressed to a past life memory.  I'm at a loss of words. It was like watching a movie play out.  The inner knowing of details is very interesting. There is so much going through my mind right now.  I can't believe how real and vivid it all was.  It was like I was really there experiencing it all over again.
            My friend Linda, the past life hypnotherapist asks, "How do you feel Steve?"
            "I feel great; I can't wait to do some research for Ireland in 1493."  I tell her.   

Written by

Monica Davis